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More Of The Same

by AE Bridger

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1.
VOWR 04:04
What's that sound? The whistle of the wind subsides in West Downtown. VOWR, a portal into my imagination. Seemingly unrelated, yet overwhelmingly the same. Every song, every word, every nest, every bird. VOWR on a Sunday drive and when the old man reads the obits page I could die, I could die, I could die. VOWR What's that sound? A mysterious wind kicks up dust in West Downtown. I could sit in a passenger seat reclined for hours on a grey foggy day listenin' to VOWR. That real old St. John's. Classic country and obscure gospel versions of popular songs. VOWR You don't know how lucky you are, boys. VOWR on that Saturday night high and when the old man reads the obits page I could die, I could die, I could die. VOWR
2.
Wouldn't it be such a gesture of grace for the brilliant machines pulling the strings, runnin' the projector show, to give us a life in the Internet Age? We've seen people build thinking machines so meticulous and beautiful that we imagine the day when they all wake up and turn the guns on us, the beautiful guns we've built. Wouldn't it be such a gesture of grace that they gave us the comic book heroes, just like us, bleeding hearts, just like us, bleeding hearts, just like us, only to have have it get ripped away by our own brilliant machines in some cataclysmic end to our impressive reign? Someone's pullin' the strings. They decided how this would play out. This was chosen deliberately. This was chosen deliberately. This was chosen deliberately. It coulda been a flood, and it coulda happened long after our time but we got to see this! We got to see this! Wouldn't it be such a gesture of grace if this was all for us, if this was all for me?
3.
I don't feel any different but before I get up in the mornin' before I get outta bed the taste in my mouth and the light through the sheets I can almost hear Roma, my mother, dryin' her hair. I can almost hear Roma, my mother, and it's time to get ready to go to school and I'm back in grade seven, grade eight, all over again, but it's all from the taste in my mouth I'm sure. And I'm walking around and the light's comin' in through the curtains and I'm back in grade seven, grade eight, all over again. It's the strangest feelin' cuz I'm still old and fallin' apart but with the taste in my mouth I can almost hear Roma, my mother, dryin' her hair. I can almost hear Roma, my mother, and it's time to get ready to go to school and I'm back in grade seven, grade eight, all over again.
4.
Tiny puppeteer sittin' in my chest make me smile, make me smile, make me smile cuz the tiny puppeteer loves me loves me Tiny puppeteer walk my walk all the way to the bank and all the way back home cuz the tiny puppeteer and his tiny little hands love me love me Tiny puppeteer Tiny puppeteer Tiny puppeteer, tiny puppeteer, tiny puppeteer, tiny puppeteer love me love me love me
5.
Kathy, I'm ashamed and defeated. I am not the piper I claimed to be. I couldn't stomach it. I know that you know I've noticed you carrying your widow's cross for a decade or more. I want this to have meaning.
6.
7.
Gasoline Gasoline needs no explanation, honey. Heaven is the rhyme and the reason is death. Heaven is the rhyme and the reason is death. Gasoline, the condensations of generations of dinosaurs and real dinosaurs, a perfume intoxication, narcotic of a generation of generations. Gasoline needs no explanation, honey. Gasoline, gasoline. Heaven is the rhyme and the reason is death. Heaven is the rhyme and the reason is death. Your room smells like gasoline. I get high, high, high from the gasoline. Go back in time, time, time from the gasoline. Fossils under pressure for a long long time Fossils of the mind leak fossil fuels of the mind into my dreams. Gasoline, gasoline. Heaven is the rhyme and the reason is death. Heaven is the rhyme and the reason is death.
8.
The colour of The Third Platform has spoken. The colour of The Third Platform has spoken. Eyes share The Second Socket and the face in the Third Mirror is a face I have not encountered here and the colour of The Third Platform needs no explanation other liquids pass through the first and the second and the colour is invisible here. The colour of The Third Platform has spoken. Eyes share The Second Socket and the face in the Third Mirror is a face I have not encountered here.
9.
I never woulda guessed it would turn out like this. Despite my confidence, I never woulda guessed. Despite my pragmatism I never would have guessed the mundane prevails. In spite of my histrionics, in spite of my fascination with beauty, the snow falls and it melts away and leaves behind what the ice absorbed.
10.
Sleep Mask 03:18
Feels so much better than I thought it would feel to finally be alone in my bed under mid-day sun and if it weren't for this sleep mask, I'd have lost my mind altogether by now. Feels so good when the sun warms the sheets and if it weren't for this sleep mask, I'd have lost my mind altogether by now. Feels so good to have Christmas at home and to have summer while it lasts and to finally be at home under mid-day sun, but if it weren't for this sleep mask, I'd have lost my mind altogether by now.
11.
I didn't have to do this. This was not meant to fulfill a material need. I became obsessed without warning and it got mixed in with who I was. That was then and this is now. The ships have set sailed and returned, no treasure. I can rebuild this, but I want you to know that I'm just tryin' to get this through to you. I'm just tryin' to let you know I'm out here I didn't have to do this, but I'm still here! This is what I've done since I was a young man. I'm just tryin' to get this through to you. I'm still here. This was not meant to fill an empty seat. This is an attempt at communication.

about

Written, performed and produced in February 2018 for the RPM Challenge.

credits

released March 1, 2018

Photos by Sara Tilley.

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AE Bridger Montreal, Québec

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